


The Fanfiction Fiasco

by covetsubjugation



Series: The Infamous Story of 'The Squad' [30]
Category: Hamilton - Miranda
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, F/F, F/M, Multi, Texting
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-08-19
Updated: 2016-08-19
Packaged: 2018-08-09 18:17:37
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,595
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7812196
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/covetsubjugation/pseuds/covetsubjugation
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>"<b>peggy</b><br/>dad has gone to lie down<br/>he has just laid on his bed and murmured “no no no” for the last few moments</p><p><b>eliza</b><br/>stick to the status quo</p><p><b>peggy</b><br/>i am dying here"</p><p>*<br/>Everyone's worst nightmare has come true. Phillip Schuyler has found Peggy's internet history.</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Fanfiction Fiasco

**Schuylers GC  
** _angel, eliza, peggy_

**peggy**  
goodbye cruel world  
my day has come  
i no longer want to exist  
goodbye

 **eliza  
**???

 **peggy**  
dad borrowed my laptop  
and as you know  
my internet history is on there

 **angel**  
oh shit  
he looked at it???

 **peggy**  
yes  
and he was questioning me on what is ao3  
and you see  
that would have been fine and easy to lie away  
except he clicked on a link  
that fic was not one of my finer moments

 **eliza  
** peggy…

 **peggy**  
i may have just killed our elderly father  
i have been Exposed  
and as such  
goodbye goodbye i am gone

 **angel**  
you were a great sister  
i love you  
goodbye

 **eliza  
** who knew it would take a sister dying before angelica reveals she has a heart

*

 **peggy**  
dad has gone to lie down  
he has just laid on his bed and murmured “no no no” for the last few moments

 **eliza  
** stick to the status quo

 **peggy  
** i am dying here

 **eliza  
** right sorry

 **peggy**  
why don’t i just  
disappear

 **angel  
** because you’re human and not a ghost

 **peggy  
** i would forward that message about logic but im too busy dying

 **angel  
** what are you going to do

 **peggy**  
idk this is unprecedented  
if someone had told me this would happen i would have prepared for it  
but no one told me  
and now here i am Suffering

 **eliza**  
how bad is the fic  
on a scale of 1-10

 **peggy  
** it can’t even fit on a scale my dear

 **eliza  
** yikes you’re dead

 **peggy  
** that’s what i’ve been saying

 **angel**  
maybe you can convince dad this was a bad dream  
if he falls asleep just wipe all traces of archive  
and put alcohol next to him so he thinks he was drunk

 **peggy**  
that might work  
hope and pray he falls asleep

*

 **peggy**  
he’s asleep  
operation save my soul is a go go go  
i’ve got the alcohol  
imma carefully spill some of the floor so he thinks he was really drunk

 **eliza  
** nice touch

 **peggy**  
~espionage~  
alright i’ve cleared my laptop and set it up so you can’t look at archive  
imma leave so he thinks i’ve been out all day

 **eliza  
** nice plan where are you going to go

 **peggy**  
idk pokemon go?  
maybe i’ll come up to your campus

 **eliza  
** that’s a 4 hour round trip

 **peggy**  
oh yeah  
i’m just going to play pokemon go then text maria and ask if she wants to go on a date

 **eliza**  
good plan  
have fun  
be nice

 **peggy  
** yes mum

 **angel  
** #mumfriend

*

**Maria <3  
** _last seen at 14:34_

heyo  
wanna go on a date

can’t  
working today ):

):  
don’t kill any customers

no promises

*

**Schuylers GC  
** _angel, eliza, peggy_

**peggy**  
well maria’s busy  
so im just gonna go fuck around

*

 **peggy**  
wtf there’s a tentacruel in town  
there are so many people here why are crowds a thing  
i hate people  
ngl i stopped in the street for five minutes to catch the tentacruel  
i wasted so mAny pokeballs hold me

 **angel  
** go find a pokestop

 **peggy**  
trying to  
ooh this coffeeshop is a pokestop  
i want food

 **eliza  
** does this count as cheating on your gf

 **peggy  
** idk sis lemme ask her

*

**Maria <3  
** _online_

does it count as cheating if i buy food from another coffee stop

god no i hate my job go crazy

bless bye

*

**Schuylers GC  
** _angel, eliza, peggy_

**peggy**  
she says no  
coffee it is  
why are there so many pidgeottos  
i am tired of this bird  
i’m tired of magikarp too  
i recognise i need to catch more to evolve it  
but ew  
like literally  
"Magikarp is a pathetic excuse for a Pokémon that is only capable of flopping and splashing. This behavior prompted scientists to undertake research into it."  
even the game agrees with me

 **eliza  
** it says that??

 **peggy  
** yeah

 **eliza  
** oh wow

 **angel**  
i am so late for class  
can’t i just not go

 **eliza  
** you’ll ruin your perfect attendance record

 **peggy  
** lol nerd

 **angel**  
hush child  
it doesn’t matter  
i am so late  
if this class was my period i would be the virgin mary by now  
im just going to go back to the dorm  
at least theo is there

 **eliza  
** wouldn’t aaron be there too

 **angel**  
nah  
theo said aaron said alexander was taken off hiatus so he can work again  
so now he has to be around to make sure the world doesn’t end

 **peggy**  
fyi people are flooding into the store  
idk why  
is tea time rush a thing  
hOLY SHIT  
THERE’S A PIKACHU SOMEWHERE  
BYE

*

 **peggy**  
I GOT IT  
HAHAHAHA

 **angel  
** nO FAIR

 **peggy**  
i’m just going to use this as a reason for why i am the Greatest  
just casually whip it out and be like  
“bEHOLD"

 **eliza  
** that would be so weird

 **peggy  
** yes but it would be funny

 **eliza  
** if you say so i guess

 **peggy**  
i got too enthusiastic while cheering and knocked over my drink  
time to leave

 **angel  
** i am currently so comfortable in bed

 **eliza  
** while the notes you have missed rustle away

 **angel  
** must you ruin this for me

 **peggy  
** how long do you think i should stay out for

 **eliza**  
it’s been like an hour  
dad naps for like 2

 **peggy  
** alright then what shall i do

 **angel  
** you could run errands for me

 **peggy  
** lol no

 **angel  
** it was worth a shot

*

 **peggy**  
i have returned home  
and it was like in the movies  
i just stepped in as he stepped out of the room  
kept this straight face  
and was like  
“hi dad!”  
“er…hi…, have you been out all day?”  
“yeah! i went to visit maria!”  
“oh that’s good?”  
“are you okay you’re acting weird is it the hangover?”  
“hang…over?”  
“yeah you were drinking last night but you’re okay right?”  
“i…think…so?”  
“cool imma make dinner”  
HE IS SO CONFUSED

 **angel  
** you’re going to make our dad think he has a drinking problem

 **peggy**  
better than knowing he has a daughter who reads fanfiction  
god has banned me from heaven based on the amount of fanfiction i read  
satan has a special throne for me downstairs

 **eliza  
** you’re not that bad

 **peggy**  
i’m hiding in my room  
i can hear dad v e r y  s l o w l y cleaning up the drink  
any moment now he’s going to come in and be “margaret???”  
no dad you were dreaming nothing happened

 **angel**  
let us know how that goes  
theodosia is braiding my hair this is so nice  
i feel so loved and comforted

 **eliza**  
take a picture  
you can pin it up on your string picture thing

 **angel**  
good idea  
except im comfortable  
and don’t want to move

 **peggy  
** the door is creaking bye guys

*

 **angel  
** i did such a good job on theo’s hair

 **eliza  
** ngl you did

 **peggy**  
THAT WAS SO AWKWARD  
I HAD TO KEEP A STRAIGHT FACE THE WHOLE TIME

 **eliza  
** what did he say??

 **peggy**  
“margaret??? did i use your laptop recently?”  
“er not that i remember, why?”  
“are you reading… [awkward hand gestures]”  
“WHAT DAD NO PLEASE”  
“just checking!!! i know that you’re probably getting older now and having-”  
“please do not give me the sex talk i do not want it im fine”  
“okay bye”  
this is where my spiral of lies has gotten me  
The Sex Talk™

 **angel  
** well that’s what you get for not being careful

 **peggy  
** everything is on incognito tab from now on is2g

 **eliza**  
that’s probably a good idea  
and i’m free from class!!  
i’m going downtown do you want anything

 **angel  
** would you run my errands for me

 **eliza**  
i meant like coffee and/or pads  
not errand-running

 **angel**  
fine be that way  
theo says reese’s cups  
can you buy me like a bunch of pens

 **eliza**  
how many and what colour  
imma go muji for that

 **angel**  
black as my soul please  
some blue too

 **eliza**  
okay so  
reese’s cups  
flowers  
pens

 **peggy  
** who are you buying flowers for hmm?

 **eliza  
** aaron for helping with the plant

 **angel**  
aww that’s so nice –t  
he likes sunflowers –t

 **eliza  
** thanks for the heads up!!

*

 **eliza  
** i ran into laf and john downtown

 **peggy  
** ooh where were they

 **eliza  
** making out on the side of a starbucks

 **angel  
** bless

 **peggy  
**??? i never known you approved of their relationship

 **angel**  
okay one i’m not a parent/in any sort of position to approve/disapprove of their relationship  
two the poly squad are v cute together i just don’t tell them that  
alex’s head would explode from his inflated ego  
but yes they are all cute and good for each other

 **eliza  
** im screenshotting that

 **angel**  
rude ****  
you are evil

*

 **eliza  
** i have bubble tea!!!

 **angel  
** ooh i want one ): -t

 **eliza  
** dw i bought everyone one

 **angel  
** lord and saviour

 **eliza**  
ikr

*

**Aaron Burr  
** _online_

please open your door i don’t have hands

Okay?  
THANK YOU THE FLOWERS ARE VERY PRETTY

you're welc!!!

*

**Schuylers GC  
** _angel, eliza, peggy_

**angel**  
aaron just sent me a picture of the flowers –t  
he is very happy –t

 **peggy**  
how does aaron live with so many plants  
doesn’t his roommate mind

 **angel**  
aaron doesn’t have a roommate -t  
dk how but he was lucky enough not to get one –t

 **peggy  
** lucky guy

 **eliza**  
guys help ****  
i need you to help me open the door i can’t get my keys out

 **angel**  
ooh you’re back  
!!bubble tea!!

 **eliza  
** yeah now open the door or you won't get any

 **angel**  
):

**Author's Note:**

> Hello hello hello! I want food. Ha, that's not 100% relevant.
> 
> In case you missed it, read the last chapter of TISOTS [here](http://archiveofourown.org/works/7796221)!
> 
> I was working on another piece of work and then I got distracted, god help me.
> 
> My tumblrs are [here](http://bisexualexhamilton.tumblr.com) and [here](http://covetsubjugation.tumblr.com). Come talk to me!
> 
> Kudos and comments are always welcome, see you soon!


End file.
